You have no idea how much I have done/refrained from to TRY to prevent this. Like, refrain from being TOO happy. I mean, I don't believe in pessimism, but not TOO happy. If you get it. I realise I sound like I'm contradicting myself, haha.
But seriously. Every time I reach a 10/10 level of happiness, it'll fall to 2/10 in a snap. So magical - that's why I'm HALF CONVINCED THAT SOMEBODY IS PULLING THE STRINGS.
I'm sure rough patches fall upon everyone, but right now, it feels like I'm the only one. And somehow, wherever and whoever pulls the strings, has something in for me. Just me.
But this time it's different. I'm not gonna sit around so some sociopathic Gamemaker (if you watched the Hunger Games, you'll know what I mean) can sit around and play with my life like some board game for entertainment's sake.
I sure hope I'm just being sensitive/paranoid and this is merely a false alarm. And also, I can beat the odds. I mean, pricky prick President Snow thought he destroy Katniss by controlling that stupid game, eh? And he's always got what he wanted. Until the 74th year. I can beat this too. NOTHING must go downhill. Nothing.
Sometimes I think I'm thinking too much (Think-ception haha) Not the "adversities make you stronger" and "everything happens for a reason" lecture again, please. I think I may have a problem with phobia. Argh don't even want to think about it.