Thursday, October 24, 2013

My Ridiculous Secret Diet Blog

Not so secret anymore. And of course I didn't go through with it! As miserable as I was, I thank my lucky stars that I wasn't so far gone.

Sometimes I feel like I wasted a huge period of my life away. Other times, I feel like everything happens for a reason, and there must be, as unfathomable and seemingly stupid, a reason that I had to go through this.

And you know how completely bonkers I get when I see spelling/grammatical errors? It's ERRORS GALORE here! I feel like getting a red marker and making crosses and circles on my screen hahahhaha.

So.... Kids. Learn from me. Dieting makes your brain cloud up. You don't want that!

I was in THAT state where I couldn't even spell my name right LOL that's how far gone I was.
The spelling mistakes here are KILLING me. And seriously. Yogurt and one slide of honeydew?? What was I thinking?



Alarm Bells bring briiiiiiiing!!




 


I don't know what I was thinking. Feeling INVINCIBLE because I didn't eat? Lucky this diet thing only lasted for a bit (I am greedy like that, bwahahaha).

The thing about diets is that without professional guidance, they often backfire. And I can't say it enough, but all these sad rubbish about girls and self-image issues... they really need to stop.

I can read my blog entries from almost 2 years ago and laugh at myself. But I'm sure there are millions of girls around the world feeling as horrid and trapped as I did. And some of them pass the 'germs' on to girls around them and it becomes a freaking epidemic. This is a sad world. Whatever happened to the days Marilyn Monroe, absence of thigh gaps and all, was considered to be the most beautiful human in the world?

 

Sunday, October 20, 2013

MY NEIGHBOURS' KIDS P3

I was leaving my house yesterday and (YAY!!) one of the kids and his dad came home. I didn't even see them because I had my back facing them and suddenly I heard an enthusiastic HELLO!!!!

Then the little boy kept waving at me. :)

Even as I walked to he staircase! He only went inside when I left the floor.

THAT'S NOT ALL.
Later that evening, I came home and heard THREE squeaky voices screaming HELLOOOOO!!
And one of them walked  ran/toddled quickly to my door and held the railings and peered inside :):):)

UTTERLY ADORABLE.

And the older boy must have read a new book or watched a new television programme because he was like, "Bye guys!!!!" And then he thought for a bit, and said 'Bye Ladies!" (my sister was there too - she ran to the door when she heard their voices).

Such friendly kids omg so cuteeeeeeeeee.

Everybody loves babies, that's for sure. I just came home from the library, and just as I was leaving, there was a tiny little toddler talking a walk with his grandfather. And another middle-aged uncle (I thought he looked kinda fierce) saw that little boy and started to make funny faces and talk in baby language OMG hahahahaha that was so uncharacteristic.

Oh, and yesterday I was in a crowded mall, and a pair of twin toddlers literally stopped traffic. They were in their twin pram, both sucking on their pacifiers peacefully. (And I'd usually get pissed - but not this time, because awwwwwwwww) all the ladies who saw them immediately stopped in the middle of nowhere and bent down to coo and gush over them!! I bet they don't understand words yet BUT OMGGGGGG they were really adorable.

I know. I sound obsessed. HAHAHA. And yesterday one kept staring at me while I having tea at the cafĂ©. Sometimes when I smile back, they widen their eyes and give me toothless grins and start jumping around in their baby chairs. I should TOTALLY consider a career as a clown at kiddy parties.

Saturday, October 19, 2013

I wonder why people like me

Lil ol' me.
Boring. Kinda plain-looking.
And not very funny (except when I'm angry - and I don't even do that on purpose so that doesn't count)

You know, I seldom initiate meet-ups because I think who'd wanna spend time with me? I scared they paiseh to reject and then I don't want to corner them into doing something they don't want HAHAHA I'm such a thoughtful person.

Just now, my friend texted to ask why I've been MIA recently and then I was like *astonished expression* because WOW people actually NOTICE? So when she said "meet up soon! When you free?", I was secretly very surprised and happy but I suggested Friday very casually. HAHAHA. Because you know, Friday = after work = just dinner = a few hours. Less torture for them.

And I really don't know why she suggested Friday in the first place, but then she said "Saturday lah! Saturday better to camwhore leh coz makeup and dress nicer!!!" And then my jaw dropped coz I didn't expect anybody to wanna waste a weekend on me. Or take photos with me.  =X

Oh another thing.

You know I mentioned about going to the Print Centre to see the (magnificent) newspaper printing process? I didn't bother to ask anyone along because I thought everybody would be stuck in their offices. But then this girl I've been in the same class with a few times was there to and naturally, we had a common topic.
I will own a media empire someday! Watch out, Rupert Murdoch bwahahahha
 
Since we aren't supposed to upload (uber cool) pics/video of the printing process, here's a pic of me in the building of one of the biggest media giants in Singapore. Everybody was like "I've never been to SPH before!! HELP ME TAKE PHOTO!!" I decided to go with the flow even though I've been to all the SPH buildings. It was fun! Like taking a photo at the Eiffel Tower or Statue of Liberty! XD


Okay back to my newfound friend! I thought she was just being civil coz seriously, if I saw me on the street, I wouldn't want to be my friend. She was like "can I sit beside you? I sit ah!" when half the bus was empty and then we ended up gossiping. And then we had dinner together and went to the computer lab to study. And then after that we exchanged numbers in case got to be in the same class in subsequent semesters (she asked, not me, DUH haha I scared ppl don't wanna give me number ;X). And we were like" AWWWW we have no common modules next semester?"

And when I got to class, someone asked me about my day. And then later class started, during break, this other girl who always sits beside me (again, who'd do that?) said "I wanna go buy food leh, go with me!"

I think yesterday was "Make Shu Rin Feel Less Like A Loser Day". Hahaha.
Can't believe I just typed an entire blog post about how pathetic I am. HAHAHA.

And I came home from school to find lots and lots and lots of Chewy Junior, and you can probably guess that I loooooooove Chew Junior just by looking at my overexcited face.
 


I never knew it's so fun to be likable! Oh well, more like I forgot maybe. Because I spent 4 years as a pathetic closed-up mouse and OMG I LOVE THIS FEELING.
 
I GOTTA FEELING I'M GONNA HAVE A GREAT 2014!!!! :D:D

Sunday, October 13, 2013

Happy Birthday to meeee

Another year of being average yay! I should get an award for being the most ordinary person in the world!!!

And you know what? I was slaving over my Film Art assignment (yes I have a happening life). Had to Google something and then I saw search engine in cake form.



So I was like "wow what a coincidence, today's some special cake day? Did the Birthday Cake get invented on the 13th October or what?"  So I hovered over the page and then it said "Happy Birthday Shu!" What a pleasant surprise! :D:D Like I said, I've got no life. HAHAHAHA.

ANDDDDD if I may.....

 

I wonder how I'd react if Ellen DeGeneres wished me a happy birthday HAHA. I think I'll be the 20+ version of Sophia Grace.

And here is a pic of how I look like when I'm slaving over assignments. Like a brat HAHAHA. Tomorrow... I'll be going to the print centre to see the entire newspaper printing process! So exciting (for me, at least), can't wait!!
 :D

 
 
And just for kicks, here's a pic of me trying to wink. Okay, okay. Actually, I was trying to do the dancing eyebrow thing. Point is,  I have no idea how people manage to do things like that.
 
                                                  

Oh, and do you have this fear of people trying to guess your age? I do. Because if people tell me something like "ohhhh I think you're 30!"... I will faint. I WILL FAINT.

 

Monday, October 7, 2013

LOST COUNT OF HOW MANY I KILLED TONIGHT

Beetles, that is.

So here I am midnight, watching 'Psycho', armed with my own choice of weapons - fly swatter and Baygon Spray. If you didn't already know, Psycho is a horror/suspense film by Alfred Hitchcock. Which make me feel all the more murderous. 




Those darn beetles REALLY don't have any sense of boundaries! And I swear, those little things have VERY SHARP minds of their own. They only show up when I'm alone. And I kid you not, they CHARGE at me. Just me :( And I'm certain they aren't blind. Because as soon as my dad arrives, they go and hide. And my dad will be like 'WHAT INSECT???? There's nothing! Don't tell me you made me miss the most exciting part of NCIS for this!!!"

Sometimes when I'm feeling brave and am all "COME AT ME, BITCH!!!", they refuse to come out too (cowards! bullies!). And when I finally forget about them...


CHARGEEEEEEE

PIACKKKKKKKK

POOOOOOOCKKKKKKK

Giving me the shock of my life, and I always have to remember to be careful with my laptop, water, and phone. Coz it's not like I can make those darn beetles PAY.

And they bump around like my room is an inflatable trampoline. Funny how they seem to love to charge AT MY FACE. Cheeky imps.

Too bad I'm not afraid of them anymore (took me long enough!) and there are two dead beetles under my bed now HOHOHO. That'll teach them to not attack me AND ONLY ME! :D:D








5 minutes  into writing this...........






Oh I can officially proclaim that I don't fear those PESKY STALKERS anymore. But I might have woken up all my family members in the process. Because a 3rd beetle came and I was SO OVERWHELMINGLY ANGRY.

I dropped everything I was doing (literally, which is why I'll need to clear the loose pencils and pieces of paper after relating my ORDEAL) cornered it, smacked it repeatedly, as hard as I could and (I only realised it now, screamed f***k you while hitting it like a lunatic :X)

And then my dad, awakened by the din,  came to my room, calmly picked the dead beetles up, and then.... just as calmly, caught a new one by simply reaching into the air.


But really, I've improved, ok? Because I used give my room up to them and sleep in the balcony.

I have actually lost count of how the death count today. I think it was 4. Or 5.

Blood was shed, and a warrior was born. YOURS TRULY. HAHAHA.

All the excitement has got me exhausted. Shall have an early night today :)

And 4 beetles in a day? It's too much. IT'S A CONSPIRACY AND I REALLY HATE THEM!Huge fuzzy creepy things who keep going for the ATTACK.

 
 

Thursday, October 3, 2013

If Violence Wasn't Illegal

Poor Little Animals :(
I just watched a video (it was 20 minutes long but who the hell can sit through the full video?) of 3 girls kicking and stepping on a puppy and it was yapping away pitifully. I've read the news about girls using stilettos to step on rabbits - but they were either paid or forced to. No demand, no supply. So I would like the money-grubbers and psychopaths to vacate themselves from Earth.


Poor Little Kids :(
Have you seen children begging on the streets in the less developed parts of the world? Do you really believe there are so many blind or limbless orphans in the world? No, obviously they were stolen and blinded/maimed.


Forced Prostitution
Again, no demand, no supply. Some men who visit prostitutes who are OBVIOUSLY being coerced. Seriously, how the FUCK are you able to enjoy yourself knowing that this woman who was possibly snatched from her family is never going home, and is likely to die from abuse, diseases, or drug overdose?


Rape
OH AND RAPISTS. How much of a loser can you get, if you have to wait around in some dark corner hoping to get some? Oh, maybe you like the idea of control and power. But damn you. Don't try it on some innocent girl because a frigging rape is going to change her whole life. HAVE YOU EVER HEARD OF CRAIGSLIST AND THOSE RAPE FANTASY ROLEPLAY THINGS OR DOES THE HEAD ON YOUR SHOULDERS NOT WORK?!?!


Acid Throwers
Why don't you douse yourself in acid and see how you like it?

War
Because people should be working together to kill those who should die (sorry if this offends you but I firmly believe that some people really need to die in order to make the world a better place) instead.


Bullies.
Less bullies = less depression = less suicide. But then again, a lot of bullies have issues that's why they're such assholes, so perhaps that can be saved so I don't wish for them to die.


SWINDLERS
Cheat old people's life savings very fun is it. When you old I cheat yours (and donate to charity) you see you like anot.
I especially hate people who try to cheat their own friends' money oh that FRIGGIN happened to me but unlike that bitch, I was too much of a non-loser,  and I saw right through her stupid 'grand' office with even more stupid Animal Head motifs and BMW-Driving people walking around with secret handshakes and muttering cult-ish mantras. Sorry ah. My (pathetic amount of) money not to easy to bluff.


China Wine
Watching 'China Wine' on YouTube makes me angry too. I'm obviously not the only one because wow wow wow , 83% dislikes!!!!


As you can see, I'm in one of my rare foul moods. And while I apparently have this rare magical ability to make people feel better or See The Light (HA I should have my own talkshow), I can't do the same for myself. Anyway I have decided to stop giving a crap because it's becoming a Thing that people expect me to make them to solve their problems but are too busy counting marbles to do the same for me. And it will be better coz HELLO less pessimistic vibes!

The puppy thing was what really set me off.  Why are there so many evil people in the world and why are they still alive? They should not be allowed to exist.

Wednesday, October 2, 2013

When girls say "A lot of guys are after me"

 So... know any girls like this? I'm guessing probably you do, because this post got more likes on Instagram than usual.
Have you realised, really popular girls never say something like this? If you're hot, you're hot. Everybody knows without you making grand announcements.
 
And this tweet isn't insulting the nice girls so if you don't get the joke then please go away.
 

I think it's so funny coz an image of BitchFace and her uber thick makeup immediately popped into my mind!

  I remember how she loved to relate very detailed accounts about men ("even ang mohs you know") trying to pick her up. And she has to fend a whole army of them off like Gerard

Butler in 300 because she's married (sooo sooo draining you know haiyo!!). She even "complained" about men who continued their advances even after knowing that she's married hahaha hmmm......

*Pssst I think she is secretly pleased whaddaya think*

And every single time, I refused to say stuff I'd tell people whom I like. Stuff like:

"Aiyah coz you're good-looking mah!"

or

"Hahaha you look really young, that's why people are assume you aren't married!"

Simply because I know she is very insecure and thus, super desperate for assurance. Now, I am very good at making people (except myself) feel better about themselves (so I've heard from multiple sources *shy*) but THIS Beeeetch ain't getting any therapy from me muahahaha.

But to her credit, I did think she was pretty when I first met her (because everyone who doesn't have my face is pretty, duh) but when I pointed her out to my friends and they gave the 'wtf' looks so maybe not. Hahaha. Maybe its the makeup because I kinda think she has to stock up every 2-3 weeks - wow what a pricey investment.