Wednesday, June 27, 2012

Photo of the Week - if I Had a Penthouse Suite

Last week, I told youthat I wanted a big house with a pretty garden. This week, I'm thinking that a penthouse with a view like that is pretty awesome too.

Dilemma. Haha.

Monday, June 25, 2012

Weird Dreams

Because most people hate wordy posts, here's a picture. NOTE THE CRUMPLED PAPER FILTER. And I look like I'm missing a hand =/


Ok so I just felt asleep by accident (AGAIN) and had another weird dream.  
This is all I remember at this point of time. A minute later, I'll remember nothing, so I better type this out quick:


Dream 1:
Someone was using the toilet bowl as some sort of communication device. She was using it to talk to her friend who was in a cubicle at another location. And doing it like it was the most normal thing in the world. The  memory of her kneeling down and leaning forward towards the toilet bowl is all I have. Haha. Very fuzzy memory. Oh dreams.

Dream 2:
Pretty much everyone I knew (including my best Facebook friend- which in reality would be dumb because we'd never meet in person) was on a mountain. On a cycling trip. And wearing formal attire. And we all shook hands when we met. When usually I'd be like OMGOMGOMG HIIIIIIIIII!!!! Shaking hands with people, some of whom you've know all your life. Oh dreams.

Dream 3:
I was on a swing. On a beach.
Swinging and getting higher and higher. Then I saw a magnificient waterfall. Massive. Like Niagara Falls. And at both sides of that massive waterfall were man-made, smaller waterfalls, with the water cascading in smooth streams.
For the first time in life, i wasn't afraid of the swinging. Though I did have the cold feeling in my chest - the kind you get when you're falling from a height at high speed (if you've ever tried the Flying Fox). While swinging down I realised that thre was a beach at the OTHER side of the waterfall. nd one of my friends was in a shelter thing and pulling a lever.....
Darn I should have woken up to write the details down.



And I have another long-ass dream which I'll be dedicating an entire blogpost soon.

Wednesday, June 20, 2012

Today I woke up looking like this.

And I'm hoping to get more mornings like this.
Because, I think sometimes, even my mirror gets rude shocks. Poor piece of gleaming metal doesn't deserve this, really. It should be living some normal girl's room, and not me, the ultimate freak-o.

Some girls love to hint that they've got no dark eye circles, frizzy hair, oily face and eye-shit - and yes I'm saying all these because I'm real like that.
What do you think I'd say? That I wake up looking like Natalie Portman in that chickflick?
Taken June 2012


Though I know people who hint about how good and perfect they look oh-so-effortlessly.
Oh I have natural blablabla so I blablablablaaaaaaaa
Hehehe I cannot help it, I blablablablablaaaa
Like that's even humanly possible.


Because I usually wake up looking like..
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You sure you wanna see this?
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Well, you asked for it!
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Don't say I didn't warn you!
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I'm not sure if I should get you to sign something first.
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Okay I know I'm getting annoying.
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Question. Are you gonna get pissed if I chicken out now.
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I really don't want to bore/frustrate you.
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Ready?
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Well if you're still reading, then you definitely deserve (or maybe not) this.
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Ok last point. Get a bucket/pail/plastic bag first, please.
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I cannot believe I'm doing this.
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Here goes............
Taken 19 June 2012
Hope you had fun.
I took this just a second ago, but  I really look all crossed eyed and groggy every morning .

And at home I tie my hair and clip my fringe up and look like this (expression not guaranteed).
I have even funnier pics but I just can't muster the courage to post them.
And I'd like to do that annoying thing girls on my newsfeeds like to do:
#NOMAKEUP
if you know what the big deal with #NOMAKEUP is about, please, please let me know!


I believe I  just lowered my market value ahahahaha but hope ya all had a good laugh!!

Photo of the Week - Let it Rain!

Muddy fields. Usually kinda gross, but I'm sure all of us in Singapore will welcome rain - mud and all, with open arms. And hearts. And doors. And resevoirs. And their dams. And our water bottles. You get the idea.

The heat is so intense I feel like getting an egg and leaving it on the ground somewhere to see if it cooks. I will never, never complain about rain again. And in December, when it rains so often, I'll be saying, "GEEZ stop raining already! I haven't gone to the beach for AGES!" Humans. Tsk.

Which means I can't dress like that anymore or risk melting!

 And I have so much fat in me that I'd drown the whole country with my fatty liquids. Just like Venice, except that they're water and we'll be in fats. We'll be famous!

Tuesday, June 19, 2012

5 WEIRD THINGS I DO IN MY ROOM

There. I said it. I do a lot of weird stuff.
This must be why I get people opening/knocking on my door almost every night. Or early morning. Actually nowm it feels like EVERY SINGLE NIGHT.
Every Time I hear the click of a switch outside, I'll be like:
"DARN."
OR
"Ohhh-Kayyyyy BRACEEEEE YOUSELF! someone gonna fling the door open, anytime, starting from now!"
OR
Prepare to swivel my chair around and very chirpily say "OH HELLO!" oh-so-naturally."
OR
There she goessss, there she goesss again!

Because I do a lot of weird stuff.
And since I don't have any 5 things to say this week, just let me spout random things off in my fit of frustration.

Maybe I do weird things like....

Watching Teletubbies on YouTube.
The same video, over and over again.

Dancing to Macarena
Wearing a pink fur coat and leopard print underwear. Because if that doesn't seem like something to call for worry, what else does?

Killing/Collection Beetles
And arranging them to form the word RIP. My friends and family know that I'm plagued by BEETLE apocalypse, and I get super frustrated. So perhaps they're thinking that one day I'll break and do something crazy about beetles.

Talking to my imaginary friend.
But then again, sometimes I really talk to myself or my reflection. Or to my camera.

To improve on my verbal/gesturing skills.
And this gets ESPECIALLY AWKWARD if someone BURSTS into my room and sees it.
Because everyone has a lot to say, and no one every understands why I'm doing this.


It's like how they never understood why I carry a notebook around with me all the time - I had to write down all the random things that came to me..... and look at where that got me! YOU. and YOU. AND YOU. And you are reading my blog!!! Thank you :)

I'm doing the video thing for a reason, obviously. But the door busters will never understand.

Here's a before&after photoshop pic to keep you entertained!!
Check out my eyebags! They're so huge and chock-full of fat-cells, they have superpowers!!!



Sorry for the many spelling mistakes! I'm typing in the dark, so that the door bursters think I'm asleep!! :)
Btw do you think my nose's looking a bit smaller these days :)

Monday, June 18, 2012

5 Reasons ... Delayed Post

Actually, I haven't really got a reason.Except that the intense heat this month (always happens around June) has been making me Little Miss Lethargic. I keep falling alsleep by accident very, very early. Which explains the delay in emails, blog, and stuff (although I am very active on Instagram haha).

I'm gonna publish the post by Tuesday! And here's a new outfit.
I was going home after visiting the hairdresser... and passed by Bugis Street, the haven for cheap clothes.
And picked out 2 outfits (with accessories, yes!).

Here's one of them! Took this pic in My Secret Passageway of Mirrors. haha.

And ignore the watch this time hahaa. I have just one watch I wear all the time- the one mummy bought for me. Matches with pretty much everything else except for the more girly clothes. Good watches are expensive hello.

Ok talk  soon! :)
Sleeping with the A/C on tonight!  
Oh and I bought lots of Pink and Hello Kitty stuff from DAISO (the $2 shop) on Thursday! Only stuff that I'd use, of course. Though I'd really love to buy cute stuff that are nice to look at :)
If I had the $$$$$$$.

Thursday, June 14, 2012

Photo of the Week

So I promised myself not to blog about depressing things here, but.... there are times when I feel I'll never be able to do anything right. This is getting more and more frustrating, and I get a feeling those are not obstables, but roadblocks :(

Thus this pic of a dry, dry flower amongst the vibrant, pretty, full-of-life-and-promising-future ones.
Though if I'm having a good time now I could probably tweak this story some other way.

But then again, heh heh. This photo turned out not bad, considering I don't really have a good quality camera! I want the Casio TR 150 so, so much. Then I can take photos of myself with ease everyday. Hahaha :P
Yeah right. It's a couple hundred dollars. I need to strike Toto first.  

Sunday, June 10, 2012

5 Silly Dares that I'll never have the guts to accept

1) Get into a cab and shout :"FOLLOW THAT CAR!"
Very, very dramatically with a theatrical expression. Just like in the movies. Mmm.

2) Walk down the train aisle, runway catwalk style.
And sit down with innocent nonchalance like nothing happened.
If there's ever enough space, that is. Early afternoon, maybe!


3) Go up to the barista at Starbucks and order "Kopi Gao, mai tng"
Imagine lah.

4) Announce 'Phew, that felt good!" loudly while exiting the bathroom cubicle.
Must have shiok expression. And then smile, maybe.

5) Walk indoors with my umbrella open.
Actually, I've done that before. By accident, of course. :(
Was too engrossed in my own thoughts, I didn't realise. And my new classmates (now one of my BFFs) walked up to me to tell me. Haha.



And I could do all these on video hahahaha.
But I always chicken out.
Read all Previous Weekly "Top 5" Posts here:
http://herbigfatnose.blogspot.com/p/top-5.html

Thursday, June 7, 2012

Photo of the Week - From High Ground

Went up to the 20th floor of some building to take this. Enjoyed the view immensely!
I standing there, enjoying the peaceful sanctuary of the 20th level, and feeling exceeding envious because people living there never have to bitch and complain about the noisy traffic in the mornings/weekeds.... well, any time good for a nap, actually!


Speaking of heights, some people are terribly afraid of being on high ground. They tear, they shiver, their knees turn into jelly. Being SUPER afraid of some things I Will Not Mention, I totally empathise with them.

AND speaking of fears..... I, by a stroke of anything-but-luck, happened to be on the same train as #catwoman just now!! Was soooo looking forward to going home because I wore heels for the FIRST time in my life today and my feet were KILLING ME.



But joy oh joy.... saw her on the bus and my heart just sank. Ok, guess you're feeling lost now. Let me tell you a little more about #catwoman.

#catwoman is the lady who's been feeding cats at our void deck. Angry Cats. Who always plonk themselves right in the middle of the staircase landing. MEOWWWWA RRRRRGGGGG SNARLLLLLL. Oh and their piercing stares glares. They ALWAYS look ready to SPRING AND ATTACK! :(

Anyway, back to their link with the catwoman. EVERY TIME they see their beloved owner (as much as she can be called an owner, since she doesn't bring them home)... they LEAP down from whichever thing they're perched on and SPRINT towards her. And good luck to anyone who's in front of #catwoman. Stunned much.


So that day, I RAN FOR MY LIFE once we alighted. A damn big feat, if I say so myself :P Heels are SO NOT FUN. But it does "nicify" legs so I guess we girls gotta grin and bear it! Especially girls like me with thick calves BOOHOO :(

I was lucky coz #catwoman is older and kinda plump so I could stil move faster than her. Managed to DASH into the lift before the LEAP DOWN AND SPRINT/SPRING/ATTACK saga.
Today I feel invincible.

Monday, June 4, 2012

Just thought you needed to see my face

And also because I've got all post-exam meet-ups, won't be blogging so much, and I don't want you to forget me, do I? Anyway, these were taken on a boring Sunday evening. I had nothing better to do at home. Trololol.

Looking at this pic is like striking lottery. It will never happen again, but the feeling of getting a good shot was WHEEEEEE while it lasted.


 

Ok bye I made a video today but audio sucked so I'm gonna get a new mic! Goodnight!! And sorry about being a depressing person but I'm dreading tomorrow and next week, and I hope pray wish that everything will be alright, and that my life will be alright, wish me luck ok! :)

Sunday, June 3, 2012

5 Reasons To Hate #littlemissperfect

If you're a girl and you're reading this, there's a 99% chance that you know someone like this. The 1% are for the very priviledged littlemissperfects in the world.

Their perfect genes.
When I have to comb my hair and break a few combs in the process, slap on 1 million layers of makeup, eyeliner, and lipgloss to look relatively human-like, all #littlemissperfect has to do is wake up, brush her teeth, and get out of the house. Oh and they can eat all they like, show-off about it, and never, never gain a pound.

The supernatual abilities to never trip over anything, to land lightly whenever they walk/jumpm and the amazing power to not look like a fat freak (ie ME) in photos. Oh yes, and the ability to sneeze oh-so-daintily. The #littlemissperfects in the world have got like a trillion supernatural powers, really.

Their luck to never, never get a bad haircut/brow-trim go wrong in their entire time on Earth.

Everything goes their way. They are natually good at everything. Being beautifully pregnant mums, looking even better (if it's even possible) after giving birth, and.... well I could go on, and on, and on. Everybody loves the #littlemissperfects of the world AT FIRST SIGHT, and would do almost anything for them. Best thing is, they know it.


                                   Read all Previous Weekly "Top 5" Posts here:

Friday, June 1, 2012

Video of the Month: COCK AND COKE

I swear, I'm watching this for the 10th time (at least) and I still can't help laughing - very unglamorously, too. I burst. I snort. I hit the table, and shake uncontrollably.
So did 21 of my friends who shared the video. Thanks Norman for sending me funny links!!


And she does this with a completely straight face!!  OMG. HAHAHAHA. Very unfortunate, really, but still amusing hilarious.

I don't even want to think what I'd sound like when I try to learn a foreign language. Cos I've always wanted to learn French, German, Spanish, and yes, Korean! Oh the power of prounounciation. One teeenyyy weenyyy wrong element and the whole meaning's changed.

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Made you laugh, didn't it! Is this WTH enough?
If you didn't know already, I'm a finalist for the Singapore Blog Awards - Best WTH Blog.
You can click here to vote for me a win cool stuff for youself too!
I can't tell you just how much this means to me, so... just imagine yourself winning Toto Jackpot la - same feeling. Thank you, this might just be my ticket to destroy the Curse of Invisibility.


You need to spend a couple of minutes filling in your details, though. So.... please think that I'm worth your 2 minutes, and good luck winning a Casio Sheen watch, Domino Pizzza vouchers, GV movie tix, and many more!

More instructions here: